Crazy Dream
by YummyYaoiSandwiches
Summary: Shuichi is depressed because he feels he'll never reach the same level as his idol, Ryuichi Sakuma. Can that very same childlike singer convince him otherwise? ShuichiXRyuichi, one-shot. R&R please!


**Hey guys, it's me xSoubiXRitsukax again. This was requested by Azmaria55 via KidzWorld. I'm sorry it took me a bit. I've never given a lot of thought to this pairing, but I do love the both of them. Hope it turned out alright, please let me know if it didn't. I think maybe I made Ryuichi a little bit too mature... Oh and note, let's say this takes place some time before episode 10.**

**So thanks, on to the fic!**

_And so, my crazy dream continues._

_I wish I could wake up in the middle of it._

Shuichi remembered saying those words, back when Fujisaki first joined Bad Luck.

It was still true now, really.

He wandered the streets aimlessly after practice had ended.

It wasn't as if he had any reason to go home early anymore...

He shook his head, causing his pink tresses to flail about in all directions. He wouldn't think about that... even though it had been months it still stung...

_"I hate you."_

There were the words again, echoing icily through his head. His heart ached, but just a little.

It had all been a mistake, really. Yu-... HE had never wanted him.

The best thing to do was move on and focus on his music, he'd decided.

... as if that was going well.

Actually, it was... From everyone's point of view but his, anyway.

Hiro and Fujisaki were happy... no big problems, and they'd even appeared on a few more music shows. Shuichi was working on a new song, and every now and then he'd get stopped by a fan...

Shuichi stopped and looked sadly down at his feet. A few passing teenage girls looked his way and whispered, but other than that no one paid him any mind.

What did it matter, though?

Shuichi wanted to sing. He wanted people to hear his song.

But no song he ever put out could possibly be as good as...

Shuichi remembered the first time he'd heard Nittle Grasper.

It was like some crazy dream. A crazy, amazing dream.

It had instantly gotten his attention, the music, the lyrics, they were amazing! So of course, when Shuichi heard they were going to be on TV, he couldn't wait, and sat eagerly in front of the television even before it started.

Then, for the first time, he saw and heard Nittle Grasper.

He saw and heard _him_.

It was then when he truly realized how amazing his vocals were, how amazing everything was.

Shuichi sat entranced as his smooth, beautiful voice poured into his ears.

Ryuichi Sakuma...

For the longest time, his idol, his role model... nay, his god!

He'd watched him whenever he could, memorized every song, imitated him for years...

... And all for nothing.

Shuichi remembered when he'd first met Ryuichi. Heck, it hadn't been all that long ago.

Opening for ASK, getting choked up... and suddenly hearing his lovely voice ring throughout the club...

And the next thing he knew, there he was! Him, Shuichi Shindou, singing with Ryuichi Sakuma!

No matter how long he lived, Shuichi bet that would be the happiest day of his life.

But...

Now matter how he tried, he would never be good enough. Fans, shows, albums... it still wasn't enough.

And Shuichi realized it never would be.

Which was why Shuichi was now lying face down in the middle of the road, feeling defeated.

Hadn't this happened before?

Frankly, the pavement wasn't very comfortable and it wasn't making Shuichi feel any better. Added to the fact that it was so hot from having the sun shine down on it all day...

Still, the poor pinkette couldn't find the will to get up.

Ryuichi hummed happily as he strolled down the street. It was such a pretty day! Kumagoro was happy, too.

"Aren't you, Kumagoro?"

Ryuichi was sure Kumagoro answered yes.

He rounded the corner, still humming.

After all, Rage Beat was so catchy!

He sure wished he could sing with Shuichi again. Maybe he could finally get his autograph...

"Shuichi!"

His eyes lit up instantly. How lucky was that? He was right there!

Ryuichi bounded over as fast as he could.

"Oi, Shuichi!"

He skidded to a stop by his side. It was only then that it fully registered that Shuichi was lying face down on the ground.

Hadn't he seen this before?

"Shuichi?"

He knelt down and poked Shuichi in the side.

"Shuichi? Are you dead again?"

He finally stirred after a few more pokes. He started to lift his head off the road slowly.

It couldn't be...?

"Mr. Sakuma!" Shuichi scrambled to sit up properly.

Ryuichi beamed. "Shuichi!"

He was still trying to decide whether to just strike up a conversation, beg for an autograph, or say hello for Kumagoro when he got a better look at Shuichi's face...

"Eh? Shuichi? Are you okay?"

He looked well enough... mostly. Slight bags were starting to form under his eyes, and he looked thinner than the last time he'd seen him.

Worst of all for Ryuichi... he didn't look very happy at all.

"Ah, I'm fine." He replied, finally standing up and dusting himself off.

Ryuichi did the same.

"Are you sure? You don't look good."

"Ah, I'm fine Mr. Sakuma." Shuichi tried to assure him. "I've just not been feeling very well lately... but I'm fine now!"

Ryuichi, childlike though he could be, didn't look convinced.

"Maybe you've been working too hard." Ryuichi patted him on the shoulder. "You should slow down. Here, would Kumagoro make you feel better?"

He held out the toy innocently, smiling gently at his friend.

This time around, Shuichi actually slowly took it from him.

He knew he probably looked awfully silly, cuddling a toy at his age... But, it was actually really soft, and he was willing to try anything to make himself feel better. Plus, it smelled like...

Was that what Ryuichi smelled like? Shuichi had never really gotten that close...

He suddenly wished he could.

"Do you feel better now?"

Shuichi glanced up at him. Ryuichi continued smiling innocently.

"Maybe a little..."

Ryuichi frowned, which was something he didn't do often. Why was his friend so sad?

"Maybe you are working too hard." He put his arm around Shuichi gently and began leading him over to a nearby bench.

Shuichi jumped a bit at the sudden contact, but Ryuichi didn't seem to notice.

He realized he was now as close as he'd wanted to be a moment ago...

Wait, why did he want to be so close?

They both sat down. Shuichi scooted over so there was a respectable distance between the, but Ryuichi scooted right back over to him.

Shuichi felt himself growing a bit nervous.

Well, or course he was nervous, right? He was sitting right next to the person who'd been his idol for years... of course he wanted to be close to him.

That was the reason, right?

"You need to take it easy Shuichi."

Shuichi looked over at him out of the corner of his eye. He was smiling again.

"It's great to put so much work into your music. I mean, heck, it's great stuff! I wish I could listen to it all the time!"

Shuichi felt a sharp pang in his heart and looked away. Ryuichi continued to grin obliviously.

"But if you don't give yourself, enough breaks, you'll get sick!"

He continued to stare at his feet... this was now only making him feel worse.

"So don't work so hard, okay?"

His smile faded when he got no response.

"Shuichi?"

The pinkette said nothing.

"Shuichi?"

No response.

"Eh? Shuichi?"

The green haired singer began poking him lightly again.

He stopped short of three pokes when he heard Shuichi speak again.

"You're probably right."

Ryuichi's grin returned.

"Of course!" He chirped merrily. "Kumagoro thought so, too. Right Kumagoro?"

Shuichi glanced down at the toy he was still clutching to his chest. He held it even tighter.

"After all... it's not as if there's in any point in me working so hard."

"Eh?" His broad grin faded.

"I mean, since it's never going to amount to anything and all..."

Shuichi spoke quietly, almost to himself.

"There's no reason to work myself to the bone. It's probably hard on the others, too... and for no reason, since..."

"Shuichi?"

The pinkette finally turned to look at him.

Ryuichi's eyes widened at the expression on his face.

He was smiling, but... he looked so sad, so defeated...

"Yes?" He asked quietly, the small, sad smile shrinking.

"What are you talking about?"

He looked away again.

"I'll never be as good as you are."

If the former vocalist for Nittle Grasper was having trouble before, he was sure beyond confused now.

"Eh?"

"So, there's no point in working so hard." He continued, unconciously holding Kumagoro tighter.

"Since I'll never amount to anything compared to you, really."

Ryuichi was dumbstruck. He had no idea what to say.

"I might as well just do my best and try to relax. But still, it's disappointing that-..."

"Shuichi."

"-... I'll never be as talented as you. I mean, you were my idol for years..."

"Shuichi."

"And for the longest time, I thought maybe I had a chance." He looked down dejectedly. "But it turns out that-..."

"SHUICHI!"

His blue eyes widened and he gasped as he found his face was jerked towards Ryuichi's abruptly.

He was stuck looking him straight in the eye, with Ryuichi's hand still holding firmly onto the end of his chin.

"I don't like Shuichi when he says things like that."

He realized how close they were as he felt Ryuichi's warm breath on his face. His face... it held a more serious expression that Shuichi had even seen on him before. Almost immediately he found himself becoming lost in those big, dark green eyes...

"Shuichi, you are amazing."

His attention was torn away from his eyes as his soft voice, quieter than usual, drifted into his ears... so close...

"You have real talent! Especially for how long you've been at it."

Shuichi's face fell as the statement registered. How could that possibly be...?

"I love your music! So many people love your music! If you just keep trying, of course some day you'll be as good as me! Shuichi is as good as me now! Maybe even better!"

He was about to pull away. About to object, and tell him how wrong he was. He could never be as good as Ryuichi! Bad Luck would never be as wonderful as Nittle Grasper! Never ever...

But just before he could, he noticed that Ryuichi's smile had returned. It wasn't a wide, silly grin like it usually was, and his face was somehow still serious. But the smile was there, small, sweet, and...

"You can't down yourself like that." He used his free hand to poke Shuichi lightly in the nose. "Never give up... never say that. You have talent, your songs are so catchy, you... you..." His smile waverdd just a bit as he found words failing him. But it returned quickly. "You're just amazing."

Shuichi didn't know where it came from, but he suddenly felt himself tearing up.

His smile... his eyes... the look on his face, the way he spoke to him...

Shuichi could tell... he was being sincere.

A tear trickled down his cheek gently. Whether it from Ryuichi's kind words, all the stress he'd been feeling lately or something else entirely he didn't know.

All he knew was... Ryuichi meant what he said.

And he felt the pain in his heart slowly subside.

He also realized he knew that Ryuichi's hair looked beautiful in the setting sunlight. Had they really been talking that long? And his eyes... big, bright, full of kindness, playfulness, determination... and his words...

"Shuichi?" He frowned. "Why are you crying"

Sweet, innocent, honest...

Shuichi suddenly found himself... smiling?

"I don't really know." He admitted. "But... I feel better now... Mr. Sakuma... Ryuichi."

He didn't know what he was thinking, really. He didn't know what came over him. But at that moment... he felt better than he had in weeks. Shuichi smiled wider as he stared into his face... he suddenly looked more beautiful than ever.

Did he just say beautiful?

He leaned his face in closer to him.

Ryuichi's smile remained, glad that he could help. He was just about to say something else...

... But found himself promptly cut off by a pair of soft, warm lips.

His eyes widened as he took in the situation.

Shuichi was... kissing him?

Shuichi's eyes were closed, so he couldn't see Ryuichi's surprised face... but surely it was beautiful even then.

Shuichi loved how soft his lips were. These were the lips his lovely voice passed through every time he sang... full and moist.

He felt himself smile into it. He was really on cloud nine. He couldn't believe he was kissing Ryuichi Sakuma... he was kissing Ryuichi Sakuma...

_He was kissing Ryuichi Sakuma!_

He pulled away abruptly, shocked at his own actions.

He just kissed Ryuichi Sakuma!

Ryuichi only stared at him, shock etched into his pretty features.

If there was anything he was expecting to happen, it wasn't that. He bet Kumagoro wasn't expecting it either...

Kumagoro! Why was he watching like that?

"Ah!" Shuichi felt the heat shoot into his face. "I... I'm sorry!" He turned away quickly.

"I... I don't know why... I didn't mean to..."

Ryuichi's face softened as the shock slowly wore off. A gentle smile graced his face once again.

He paid no mind to the apologies the pink haired star was blubbering. He rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Oi, Shuichi!"

The pinkette looked back at him shyly.

"I... I didn't..."

"Shh!"

Ryuichi brought a finger gently to the other's lips.

"I'm not upset, just... surprised."

"But..." He was gently hushed again.

Ryuichi leaned in, and whispered into his ear. His breath tickled and Shuichi shivered.

"Did that make you feel better?"

"I... I..."

He was at a loss for words.

Honestly? He guessed... it really did.

"I... yes?" He squeaked out, blushing once more.

"Then I'm glad I could help!"

Shuichi laughed in spite of himself. The silly grin was back.

"Hey." Ryuichi whispered.

He moved his hand off Shuichi's shoulder. Shuichi glanced down and realized he was using both of them to cover Kumagoro's ears.

"It made me happy, too."

His eyes widened. Was he really hearing this...?

Ryuichi leaned in closer...

Yep, he was really hearing this.

Closer...

They were less than an inch apart. Shuichi saw him close his eyes and slowly did the same.

Their lips just barely brushed against each other when...

"Wait."

Shuichi's eyes popped open in confusion. The green haired singer was looking downward. He followed his gaze and realized he was looking at the stuffed toy he still had in his arms.

"He's watching."

Shuichi blinked.

Then he laughed...

And laughed...

How long had it been since he'd laughed?

"Eh?" Ryuichi looked confused. "What's so funny?"

Shuichi's laughter died down into light giggles.

"Nothing." He lied, wiping his eyes. Serious or ridiculous... Ryuichi was making everything so much better.

"I think he's a pervert."

Shuichi chuckled.

"Then how about a turn him this way?"

He turned the toy around and sat it down on the bench, facing away from both of them.

Ryuichi frowned.

"But he'll still _know_."

"We would've had to tell him eventually."

"I guess..."

Shuichi took hold of his chin this time and tilted it up towards him.

Ryuichi met his gaze and smiled.

The sun finished it's descent out of the sky just as their lips met once more.

Ryuichi smiled into the kiss.

So did Shuichi.

It really was like some crazy dream...

Only this time, Shuichi was in no hurry to wake up from it.


End file.
